Feed the Needy, Empty the Prisons

Feed the Needy, Empty the Prisons

What if we can fix the prison overpopulation problem and help feed those in need?

It's quite simple, take everyone serving a life sentence or more and anyone on death row. Feed them for a year on a gluten-free, organic diet. Make sure they get a lot of yard time. Then euthanize them.

After they have been dispatched, take their flesh, and grind it up into hamburger meat.

This meat will then be sourced to those who are living on welfare. This will be the only meat welfare recipients will receive from the government.

Not only will those in need who are unwilling to work receive organic, free-range protein. A hot commodity these days. We will cut the prison population dramatically.

This arrangement will serve American society two-fold:

It will first serve as a deterrent to those who commit violent and heinous crimes in our society. Prison will no longer be 3 hots and a cot. But feedlots for finishing meat that will be served to the less fortunate. Or in this case, lazy individuals who refuse to work. The stigma of being eaten after being sentenced to prison will serve as a way to ward off criminal activity. Being hanged was a public affair in the old west. The thought of swinging from a rope in front of hundreds of people was a deterrent. Being eaten would serve the same purpose.

Able-bodied Americans who will eat this meat will also have to think twice about their situation. Donner, party of 42 million, your dinner is ready. If you were forced to get a job or eat human flesh to survive, you'd get off your ass and go to work. This wouldn’t apply to children or those who are suffering from real disabilities. Men and women between the ages of 18 and 55 who will not work to feed themselves  can have a pretty cushy life. Watching tv and eating steaks on our tax dollars. But reduce that to human hamburger, rice, beans, and water - I’ll bet that teat dries up quickly.

Thus solves the problem of prison overpopulation, and cuts government spending on entitlement programs.
I look forward to your support as I announce my candidacy for state congress in the following months.


Ruston Kelly's Dying Star - My Album of the Year.

Ruston Kelly's Dying Star - My Album of the Year.

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